Sabado: Llegamos a una lluvia torrencial

After we got out of Mexican Customs, we had to walk through a gauntlet of timeshare salesmen.  The timeshare thieves get to work inside the airport and the people we needed, the people who were taking us to the resort, had to stay outside.  Ah, capitalism.

In the ancient Mayan language, they say “It rained like a mother fucker.”  They are not equipped for such rain on the Yucatan peninsula.  There were lakes on the highway.

Domingo: Víamos el fútbol y tomamos tequila

It was 80 and Sunny on Sunday and I spent the entire day in a bar in Playa del Carmen watching football.  I told my Uncle Don that I didn’t care for tequila.  He said that was because I never had good tequila.  He was right.  We got pretty lit.

Lunes: Golf

Monday I went to the timeshare breakfast with my mom.  What a racket, but that’s for another post.  After breakfast, brother-in-law Greg set up golf from himself, Amber, Andrew, and me.  The above picture is of a coatimundi.  That’s a mammal that looks like a raccoon had sex with a lemur.  He walked across the fairway plain as day, but by the time I could get my iPhone out, he was into the trees.  He’s between the two palm tree trunks.  If you zoom in, you can see his tail sticking straight up.

We all lost our last ball on the last hole, so the round finished in a four-way tie (disqualification).

Martes: Ruinas

On Tuesday we drove 2.5 hours to Chichen Itza, a Mayan ruins site.  It was disappointing. After the ruins, we ate lunch at a buffet.  It was disappointing.  After lunch, I swam in a cenote.  It was disappointing.  After that, we visited a colonial town.  It was nice (my expectations were sufficiently low for that one).

On the way home, we stopped at a bakery in Playa del Carmen to get a cake for Amber’s 18th birthday.  It was a terrific little bakery.  The baked goods looked great, the place was laid out great, and the staff were very friendly.

Miercoles: Sin horario

Tuesday was filled with schedules and stuff.  So Wednesday, I decided that I would be beholden to no one.  I spent the day at the pool getting sun burned and drunk.  And other than that manatee in the Texas Rangers hat that got loose, it was an enjoyable day.

Jueves: Más tiempo en la piscina

I enjoyed Wednesday so much, that I decide to spend Thursday at the pool too.  I nursed my second degree burns with Modelo Especial, but it only helped a little.  Nancy went shopping in Playa del Carmen with her family.  Saying ‘queso’ while taking a picture isn’t as good as saying ‘cheese’.

Viernes:Pasé tiempo en la playa

This is the longest vacation I’ve taken since I spent two weeks in Europe in the early 1990s.  I was pretty much done after Wednesday.  I was as sunburned and hungover as I was going to get, and two more days wasn’t going to make it better.  The beach at this resort was in pretty bad shape.  They said that all the rain has washed away the sand, but I don’t buy it.

Amber got the heaviest drink she could buy.  Nancy and I checked out the flamingos they have at the resort.

Sabado: De nuevo en casa

We did nothing on Saturday except travel home.  I don’t have any photos about how disgusting the Houston airport is, so here’s a photo of the Dach family pretending to be sad on Amber’s birthday.  They are so genuinely happy that they can’t even pretend to be sad, and that makes me sad.  Or is it happy.

I take a lot of pictures with the intent on creating a blog post and then never do.  Here are some blog posts that I should have done.

This was posted on the men’s room door at WO Wrights, a little hole of a bar in Beavercreek, OH.  If this were a real blog post, I would harp on about 15 things, but to keep it brief I’ll just point out that they said “dew rags”.  Do they think people where them so the can wipe the dew off their windshields in the morning?  According to the Online Etymology Dictionary it’s an abbreviation of hairdo and rag.

If I just had one of these pieces of rubber, I wouldn’t feel so suicidal when I’m at my computer.  It keeps the left side of my keyboard tray from moving and is annoyingly absent from the right side.  Do you know how much these cost?  $120 and then you throw away the rest of the keyboard tray.

We had Thanksgiving at our house, as is tradition.  Andrew had a beer. Actually it was apple juice, but it looked like a beer.  Nancy made him drink it out of a fancy glass.  Why do women go insane on Thanksgiving?  Good china, dinner at 2:30, drinking apple juice out of pilsner glasses, wearing pants all day.  C’mon, it’s just Thanksgiving.  We recently decided that Christmas dinner would be at 7pm.  You can’t host Rich and Debbie and start at 2:30 because everyone gets wrecked.

The next day I got up bright and early (it was bright, I was decidedly not bright) and went to Iowa @ Nebraska.  Here’s a photo from Barry’s which is turning into a sushi bar after football season.  RIP Barry’s.

Christmas at Kim’s on December 4th.  That’s probably sacrilege to some families, but I’m happy to have Christmas any time.  Nancy was working that day, so she only got a lump of coal.

I took a picture of this picture on Kim’s wall.  I wonder if she still knows the OLL fight song.

The day before Andrew’s birthday, Grandma Bonnie and Grandma Vera came over with pizza and cake.

The next day, his actual birthday, Andrew got some inappropriate video games.  We’re really bad parents.  I wanted to get him something that was not on his list, so I got him a Nite Glow Ultrastar 175 gram Flying Disc (a Frisbee) and a hacky sack.  Everyone should know how to throw a frisbee and hack a sack before they get to college.  All I got was confused looks.

Later that day Granny and Grandpa Rich treated us to The Cheesecake Factory.  I had the jambalaya pasta and it was marvelous.

And finally this is a picture from the future.  I didn’t realize this, but the new iPhone can actually take pictures of things that haven’t happened yet. That Steve Jobs is one magic son of a bitch.  The only problem is, we don’t know when it will happen.

I downloaded Windows Live Writer to see if it was easier to make blog posts.  Here’s a picture of some really crappy wine:

Inserting that pictures was harder than it needed to be, but it sized it and rotated it nicely.  I wonder how lists work.

1. One
2. Two
3. Three

• Four
• Five
• Six

Here is a quote from a great man:

My pee stinks.

When I do a quote in changes the font from Arial to Georgia.  So I had to change it back.  I don’t care for that, but I do like the fact that everything on the ribbon is keyboard accessible.

I just set the category to general using Control+Shift+C, a little gem I picked up from here.  Inserting hyperlinks isn’t too bad.  I can’t think of anything else to test, so I guess I’ll hit the publish button and see what’s what.

I came across this cartoon and a sigh of relief came out.  I am so glad I am not the only one who thinks/does this.

Every single time!

My 17-year-old niece, Amber, was in town last week to play golf. On Thursday, we spent a few hours chipping and pitching at the Pacific Springs short game area. It’s a very nice facility. Then we played 9 holes at Westwood, a par-3 muni. On Friday, our round at Iron Horse got rained out, but we managed to squeeze in 9 later that day at Tara Hills. On Saturday, Amber joined my regular weekend foursome for 18 holes at Stone Creek. On Sunday, they went to the zoo in lieu of more golf, which was a good decision.

Amber has a beautiful golf swing and can really hit some great shots. It’s a very controlled, fluid swing and she seems very comfortable standing over the ball. Once she works out a few minor kinks and gets some consistency, she’ll be posting some low scores. Here are my notes for Amber:

Chipping

1. Set up to the ball normally
2. Take a half-step around the circle and a half step in
3. Bring your right foot closer to your left
4. Point the butt of the club at your left hip
5. Grip the club
6. Put 80% of your weight on your left foot
7. Make a big putting stroke

1. A normal ball position for the type of club you chip with is the middle of your stance. Don’t play it up or back, but right in the middle.
2. The ball is the center of a circle and your feet are on the circle. You want to open your stance relative to the target line. If you simply move your left foot back, you change the distance between your sternum and the ball – and that’s not good. By moving around the circle, your stance opens and the distance to the ball stays the same. If you lay a club across your toes and another club pointing at your target, the toe line should be 15° left of the target line.
3. You should be able to slide your club head between your front and back foot with room to spare.
4. This de-lofts the club. When you opened your stance by moving around the circle, you added loft to the club. Now you’re taking that loft away.
5. Don’t grip the club before this step. If you already did, let go of it, point it at the target line, and regrip. As you position your body for this shot, you move relative to the club. If you grip too early, the club won’t be properly aligned. As a check, place a tee flush against the club face and see if it points at the target.
6. The most common “miss” in chipping is blading the ball (hitting the middle of the ball with the bottom edge of the club). Blading is caused by shifting your weight backward during the shot. By putting 80% of your weight on the your left foot, you reduce any tendency to shift your weight back. If you find that you bladed a chip, ask yourself if you skipped this step.
7. If your body is a big clock with your head at 12, your backswing should go to 8 o’clock and your foreswing should go to 4 o’clock. Just like when you’re putting, your head stays absolutely still, your hips stay absolutely still, your wrists stay absolutely still. The only joint that is moving on a putting stroke, and on this stroke, is your shoulders. The club head should follow the path of your toe line, not your target line. You’ve opened the club face, so if you go straight at your target, the ball will actually go right. Swinging along the toe line feels like a big outside-in swing because it is.

This chipping stroke is the same as a full swing. The only difference between this shot and a full swing is that you are pre-setting some of the parts of the full swing so you don’t have to worry about them. On a full swing, your hips are open at impact; you step around the circle to pre-set your hips in the open position. On a full swing, your hands are in front of the club head at impact; you point the butt of the club at your left hip to pre-set this position. On a full swing, you transfer your weight from back to front; you put 80% of your weight on your front foot to pre-set this impact position. For this short shot, you don’t need a ton of power, so you take the parts of the full swing that give you power and pre-set them so you don’t have to worry about them.

How far does this shot go? It depends. Tell your dad to buy you a 58° wedge. A nice Cleveland with two-dots of bounce will do. Then you’ll have a 58°, a 52° (your sand wedge), and a 46° (your pitching wedge). Take all three of those clubs to the chipping green and hit this shot 20 times with each club. Step off how far it is to the middle of the cluster of balls you just hit and write it down (don’t worry about those mishits). You’ll probably find that your 58° goes about 10 yards, your 52° goes about 15 yards, and your 46° goes about 20 yards. You won’t know for sure until you measure, but you’ll have three distances that you will be supremely confident about.

Pitching

1. Set up to the ball normally
2. Take a half-step around the circle and a half step in
3. Bring your right foot closer to your left
4. Point the butt of the club at your left hip
5. Grip the club
6. Put 60% of your weight on your left foot
7. Make a half stroke

1. Same as chipping
2. Same as chipping
3. The distance between your feet should be more than two club heads, but less than shoulder width. Find a distance that makes you comfortable and, most importantly, be consistent with that distance – don’t be closer sometimes and further away others.
4. Because your feet are further apart, the shaft will lean less than a chip shot.
5. Same as chipping
6. Because this shot uses some body, you need a little more balance than a chip shot. But you’ll still favor the left side because it’s not a full swing. It’s closer to a full swing than a chip shot.
7. In the chip shot, you make a big putting stroke – you don’t move anything but your shoulder joints. With a pitch shot, you’ll move your hips and wrists. By taking that step around the circle, we’ve opened the hips and you won’t need as much hip movement as a full shot. Take your hands back to until your left arm is parallel to the ground and hinge your wrists. Your foreswing should stop when your right arm is parallel to the ground in front of your body. At then end of the swing, the club head should be outside of your hands. The swing, again, follows your toe line, not the target line.

Back to the chipping area with your three wedges. You might find that your 58°, 52°, and 46° go 30, 40, and 50 yards, respectively. Don’t trust those numbers, measure for yourself. If you can get those two shots working with three wedges, you’ll have 10, 15, 20, 30, 40, and 50 yard shots covered. You will hit some really bad shots while you learn these. Don’t focus on them. If you hit a couple of bad ones in a row, step back, take a breath, and go through the steps. Don’t focus on what you did wrong, focus on what you are going to do right.

Putting

Take five tees up to a practice green. Starting with a straight uphill putt, put the five tees down at 3′, 6′, 9′, 12′, and 15′. Put them off to the right side so they don’t interfere with your putts. Putt from 3′ until you’ve made two putts in a row or three putts total. Move back to 6′ and repeat. Continue until you’ve done it from all of the distances. Next, move those tees 90° counter clockwise around the hole. That should give a right to left breaking putt. Do the same drill from that side of the hole. You’ll do the same drill from a straight downhill putt and a left to right breaking putt. If you make every putt, you’ll have putted only 40 times – two putts made x five distances x 4 compass points. If you make every putt, I’d like to carry your bag on the LPGA tour.

How did you do from three feet? Pretty well, I’ll bet. When you put from 20′ or further, your goal should be to get it within three feet. Putt 20 balls from 20′ and count how many end up within three feet. Do this every time you practice and compare the numbers.

Distance in putting is driven by two things: swing arc and tempo. I put the ball directly in the middle of my stance when I putt. It doesn’t matter where you put it as long as you are consistent. For swing arc, I compare how far my back swing goes in relation to my right foot. At my home course, under normal conditions

6′ putt – half way to my instep
12′ putt – back to my instep
18′ putt – even with the tip of my shoe
24′ putt – even with my pinky toe

Every putt should last one second. That’s tempo. Say “one Mississippi” while you put so that your tempo is consistent for a certain length putt. It won’t be the same on every putt. Moving the putter back to your instep and back in one second should be slower than moving it to your pinky toe. If you practice this, however, you’ll know how far each one goes. This is especially helpful when you get into a putting funk. Have you ever blasted a putt by the hole and then left the next putt woefully short? It’s easy to lose confidence on the putting green. If you have these mechanics that you can fall back on, you don’t need to question your “feel” on the greens. You simply say “back to my instep and a one second swing” and even if it’s wrong it will probably be better than the hesitant putting stroke you were about to take.

Practice

Hit 300 balls per week. In general, hit 125 putts, 100 shots from 10-50 yards, and 75 full swings. Only 75 of those shots won’t be retrievable, so you only have to spend $10 per week on a large bucket of balls. If there is a particular part of your game you need to work on, adjust those totals as necessary.

See your swing coach for 1/2 hour at least twice per month. There is no substitute for having a professional look at your swing.

Playing

Remember that your goal on the course is to shoot a low score. That’s it. It’s not to bomb drives. It’s not to be on in two on that par 5. If you are a 3 wood away from the green and you just aren’t comfortable hitting it, then hit two 7-irons. The best club to use is the one that gives you the lowest score the majority of the time. Practice is for getting better and playing is for posting a low score. Do you want to have fun playing golf? Me too. It’s more fun shooting 79 than 99. Trust me.

Play competitively at least once per month when you’re not in season. Find someone, possibly from your team, that will play you in a 50¢ a hole match. You need to be standing over three foot putts when there’s something on the line on a semi-regular basis.

I had a great time while you were here. I look forward to doing it again next Summer.

I was writing an e-mail to Aimee that was getting pretty wordy. I figured it belonged in a post for dozens of people to read instead of in an email for just one.

eGolfer: I posted a few days ago about eGolfer, but I don’t want to give the impression that I endorse it. It’s not bad, but the user interface could use some work. I’m on the GHIN website about once a week so I thought I’d give it a shot.

Handicaps: You only need an official handicap if you’re playing in a competition that requires it. I still recommend that you get one at some point. When you need it, it will be too late because you need a minimum number of scores. I’ve had one for several years and maybe needed it twice.

An official handicap costs $20-$25 per year at a local course. I get mine through Indian Creek and it’s part of the cost of my permanent tee time. If you’re a member of a country club, even just a social member, I’ll bet they would keep your handicap for free.

Even if you don’t get an official one, you should keep it unofficially. You might have already guessed that I have a spreadsheet for that purpose. I don’t think it handles nine hole scores automatically, but I would fix it if there was interest. You can find it here. If you do keep it yourself, you’ll want to know the rules. You can read the USGA Handicap Manual for that information. It’s a little more complicated than averaging your scores, but it’s worth the effort in my opinion. It really gives you a good measure of your potential as a golfer.

Statistics: I’ve never actually recorded my golf statistics and I don’t even track them for every round. I wish I had, though, and if you’re just starting out in golf I encourage you to track and record your stats for every round. I don’t have any stat tracking applications that I can recommend, other than Excel or a notebook. The tracking programs I’ve seen tend to try to do too much. I only really care about score, fairways, greens in regulation, putts, and penalties. Some people go a little overboard and track putts over 20 feet, putts under 6 feet, sand saves, up and downs, and whatever else they can think of. I think it’s measuring for the sake of measuring and really doesn’t help improve your game. Although if I found that putting was consistently my problem, I could see some benefit in breaking that stat into more granular data. If you’re just starting out, track those main four stats at a minimum and whatever else you think is interesting.

When I track my stats, I do it right on my scorecard. I put my score in the middle of the box, just as it was meant to be. Then I use the four corners of the box to records my stats. The top left gets a “1″ if I hit the fairway, a “0″ if I didn’t, and an “X” if it’s a par-3. The top right gets a “1″ if I hit the green in regulation and a “0″ if not. The bottom left is the number of putts and the bottom right is the number of penalties. Like so

Golf Tips: Here are my tips for beginners:

• Take Lessons – Oh how I wish I had taken lessons earlier in my life. It’s hard to find a pro you like, put don’t settle for one that you don’t. If you take one lesson and don’t like the pro, go find another one. If you’re at Golf Tec, make sure you space out your lessons so that you have time to work on things in between. My experience was that they scheduled lessons too close together. If you want a woman professional, Sue Wieger has a good reputation. She used to give lessons at Indian Creek and she may still.
• Learn the Rules – Do you enjoy reading the US Tax Code? If so, you’ll enjoy reading the USGA Rules of Golf. I tell people that they can save a lot of strokes just by knowing the rules. It’s a lie. The more ignorant you are of the rules, the better scores you’ll have. The only way knowledge of the rules helps your score is if someone is watching you who also knows the rules. But that’s no excuse for not knowing them. Games are played according to rules and if you want to play golf, you should play by the rules. I recommend Barry Rhodes website and books. The USGA app for the iPhone is worth the $5 too.
• Practice and Play – The best way to lower your handicap is to understand one fundamental thing about golf. When you are playing a course, your goal is to shoot the lowest score. That may seem obvious, but it’s not. If you hit a terrible drive, for instance, and are left with a very long shot to the green, you may be tempted to pull out the 3-wood. That’s the club in your bag that will go the farthest, right? That depends. How well do you hit your 3-wood? If it’s not a club you’re comfortable with, or you mishit a high percentage of shots with it, then it’s probably better to hit two 8-irons. If you want to get better at hitting your 3-wood, you should go to the range and practice. Practice is for getting better, playing is for shooting a low score. Don’t confuse the two.
• How to Practice – Most golfers spend close to 100% of their practice time working on their full golf swing. Your practice time should look more like this: 50% putting, 30% chipping, 20% full swing. Those aren’t written in stone, but intended to give you an idea of the relative importance of the areas of your game and their effect on your score.

Happy golfing.

There are veins in this thing.

Look who Nancy ran into

This blog is taking a summer vacation. See you in a few months.

So that’s what happens. Love it!

There was a power outage at school and in the neighborhood yesterday and when we got home my mom asked me to open the garage door.  I had to pull the garage up to open it manually but at 1st I forgot the garage was electric and I started pushing the key pad.  Later my mom went outside to enjoy the weather and saw some people down the street and they were trying to open the garage with the keypad also.  Everyone in the family tried it and couldn’t open it. After that I didn’t feel so dumb. Me and my mom just thought that was funny.